this past weekend it felt as though i'd been torn to exist between two worlds as i was recovering from unexpected post-show withdrawal.
although quite honestly, yes i'll be frank, i haven't exactly cared for the tea party in the last couple years. not even enough so to buy or listen to the latest album which they're currently touring for. ha ha.
but. despite everything, i couldn't possibly EVER deny the fact that my life shifted on that random day when i was 19 years old, when i happened to win passes to see them play live at musiqueplus. (how, i don't remember at ALL.)
also i have no concept of how many times i might have seen them live afterwards. what i do know, however, is that the music they once gave life to created of series events and encounters into my own life which would change it forever. which, i guess, even came to overpower the songs. i don't know. i can't properly explain.....cuz it wouldn't make any sense to anyone but me, but there you have it. almost 15 years later.
how to not think back about the days i'd be earning free viarail trips from taking the train so much going to all those concerts. lining up with the girls under all possible weather conditions so we'd make sure to get the best spots to watch them play. the constant adrenaline rush of possibly meeting + talking with them after events. the thick cloudy-weed-filled air at the metropolis. the crazy mosh pit in sherbrooke when i ripped out a bunch of sandra's long curly hair and she didn't even notice until i showed her. sleeping in a tent before the wasaga beach show surrounded by other strangers-fans (who'd want to know my name and i'd try my best to pronounce marie the english-speaking way so they'd understand me and failing, utterly). that beautiful summer evening at the festival d'été de québec singing our guts out during "the halcyon days" while sandra was in a freakin' trance. the grocery store nearby the warehouse venue in toronto where we used to hang out with the girls (cuz it was too cold out!) waiting for the show to begin in the evening. catching burrows' drumstick upon slightly fighting with another girl at the weird outdoors show in vermont. the jeff dolls that chantal used to make. all the people whom i crossed paths with not only here but throughout the country.....those same people who've disappeared overtime, and the ones who are surprisingly still around today. late night chats on ICQ. sleeping over at sandra's. the numerous bootleg recordings on cassettes. making our parents endure that music during so many car rides. hell, even the phase when we didn't like the band anymore so we'd constantly tease them between each other at any given occasion.
above all, i think, what i'm the most nostalgic about is the freedom. the freedom, the freedom, THE FREEDOM.
i guess it's true you can't be 20 forever.
anyway, i've now heard the latest album. a couple of songs that they played at the show remained stuck in my head and so i complied. "the ocean at the end" (the song) is pretty damn awesome: «see those starlit skies, i'm so alone. i hear those angels cry, please take me home.» and very tea party-ish.
btw and unrelated, i know it's getting pretty old but the song "transmission" is so fuckingperfect.
met up with genell at papineau metro and off we went to have dinner at la strega.
ended the evening over at place des arts:
«hamlet» by the tiger lillies & theatre republique
which was weird and wonderful and slightly wtf-ish. but all in a good way. one of those "oh, you just had to be there" kind of experience. i only wish i'd previously known a little bit more of the story, cuz honestly it was difficult to follow amongst all the randomness!
ordered it online on friday and...O-M-G .....there it was inside a big box in front of my door on sunday. super express service wowz. actually, i'd heard the apartment buzzer on saturday as well, just didn't bother getting up to check who was at the door since i wasn't expecting anyone. besides, the only one who ever uses my buzzer is mr lam to pick up the rent. but i'd already left my check for the month and it'd also been picked up + cashed. which kind of got me a little paranoid when i heard the buzzer again on sunday, assuming mr lam never found my check in the usual spot and that maybe just maybe the stupid lady downstairs from seb might have stolen it. anyhow. it was around 11am on sunday when someone buzzed from downstairs and there's nooo freakin' way i'm getting up anytime before noon on weekends (or it's gotta be worthwhile, like... very). just too bad i never managed to fall back asleep. heh.
but back to the coffee maker and even better news: at the time i ordered its price was discounted to 68,99$, and it's now already back to its original price! also used a 7% off promo code and free shipping. threw in some extra cups gasgets to complete the order.
seb & i tried it last night and so far so good. wheee. instant coffee twice a day? never again!
i apologize for not being around so much lately and unapologetically neglecting you. i do keep busy with my own little-selfish-world stuff and i love it so, so.
still caught up into the process of cleaning/re-organizing all of my past artsy crap, including the whole moving back to flickr thing. which proves to be quite tedious but fun at the same time. i dunno. it's weird.
now, the shape of things to come (aka reminder-calendar);
the tiger lillies' version of ''hamlet'' @ place des arts, november 14th
the tea party concert @ metropolis, november 28th
big artsy day shooting which seb is organizing, december 6th postponed
hopefully make it to marie-pierre's home party, december 7th
private counselling session with spiritual teacher mary, december 11th
new plastic surgeon visit (consultation only), january 16th
two months ago, i loaned $300 to a co-worker. she needed the money ASAP to help pay hospital bills for her aging mother who's been sick and close to dying back in her home country. it's not like she asked for the money or anything. somehow the topic just came up in a conversation. she was feeling bad/sad, i was starting to feel like the most horrible person having all that money in my bank account with no purpose for it yet and just nodding with a comprehensive look upon my face.
it was scary of course. once those words finally came out of my mouth. because it wasn't anything like $5, $20...or hell even $100. plus we've only been co-workers for less than a year. i'm usually not such a good person (ha!) but right there and then i felt ok with the fact that i could very well lose that money. but a good deed would be accomplished, either way.
i gave her two months to pay me back.
this morning she gave me the last $90 still missing.
this is making me feel all kinds of wonderful because although my social life is downright shitty these days, her mom is still alive. and maybe that's all that matters in this fucked up world.
ended up getting a last minute discounted ticket from lavitrine.ca, and not only was it much cheaper but the seat was actually located on an empty 4th row on the left side!!!!! could NOT have asked for better.
the play itself is definitely worth checking out. great actors (rick miller & carly street), interestingly weird but certainly not boring ride.